A friendly reminder to breathe
You've got a lot going on. Don't forget to cut yourself some slack.
It'd be the understatement of the year (well, and last year) to say there's a lot going on.
There's A LOT going on. Right now you could be dealing with any of the following:
COVID
Crazy weather in the south
Mass power failures in Texas
General stress
Parenting matters
More COVID
Everything else life wants to throw your way
Last week we got our collective asses handed to us in Texas. You know this—it's all over the news and I wrote about it last week. While we were fortunate enough to maintain power the entire time, we're still having to boil our water. It's been eleven days since I last took a proper shower. Eleven days since our son last took a proper shower. Eleven days since this family smelled decent at the same time. (Don't worry, we're taking little sponge baths and what not.)
It sounds trivial compared to so many other things happening in the world. But that's the thing: there are so many other things happening in the world. (See: list of collective global shit mentioned above) It's been really easy this past week to complain, a lot, and feel like it's all too much. And then I remembered something.
In my favorite scene from My Cousin Vinny, Vinny turns to Lisa and says, "Is there any more SHIT we can pile on to the top of the outcome of this case? Is it possible?"
I often joke with my wife and paraphrase this scene, especially when things go wrong or yet another "thing" gets added to our proverbial pile. This past week that quote has been mentioned a lot. This quote, in general, is our way of acknowledging we've got a lot going on, a lot headed our way, and we both feel the heat. But it's also our way of acknowledging that we're in this, not passive spectators.
All of this is to say—cut yourself some slack. You're a parent. Life's tough, even for the best of us. As parents or guardians, we often feel this need to shelter our children from the world. And sure, it's totally fine to shelter your children from some things going on. But, that doesn't mean you need to lie to yourself.
Acknowledge that you're going through a lot in this very moment. No matter who you are, you have the stress that comes with raising a child, the stress that comes with facing a global pandemic, the stress that comes with not seeing your loved ones as often as you'd like, and any other number of things.
You're doing the best you can, otherwise you wouldn't be reading about parenting. It's okay if you slip up sometimes. It's okay if you have a bad day. It's okay if you want to check out and go straight to bed after getting your kids to sleep. It's okay to not be okay.
Like Vinny, you might find yourself asking life, "How much more shit can we pile on top of all this? Is it possible?"
Take a moment, draw in a nice deep breath, and reply, "However much you want to pile on, I can take it." Just don’t forget to cut yourself some slack along the way.
You've got this.